Saturday, May 31, 2008


If I were rich I'd leave bigger tips.

Many years ago my husband and I went to dinner with Doug. Doug was married to my husband's cousin, Jill, before she died from a brain tumor. In his mid-twenties, Doug was adjusting to life as a young widower with a new baby. He'd been working for a while at his first job since graduating from college. For the first time in a long time, Doug seemed good. 

We went to Ruby River in downtown Salt Lake City and we arrived just minutes before closing time. Our waitress was very annoyed, especially after we ordered only an appetizer to share and dessert. Our bill was not large. When the bill came, Doug paid (for us, too, I think) and then left the waitress an extremely generous tip.  Her tip was over 5x what we'd paid for dinner. We left. We were still in the parking lot when she ran out to tell us there'd been a mistake with the tip.
"There was no mistake," Doug said. Then he smiled, "have a good evening." 
She was shocked, but she did mumble a genuine "Wow, thanks."
In the car, Doug smiled, "I've always wanted to do that," he said. 

We then drove to the hospital where Doug's good friend from high school was dying of pancreatic cancer. He and his wife asked Doug for advice on losing one's spouse while their two toddler boys climbed on the bed rails and pulled on IV lines. 

Sitting there, amid the heartbreak it was nice to know that the waitress, at least, had had a good night. 

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Shout Out

I'm giving a big shout-out to my sister-in-law, Kaylee, who won the Idaho 4A girl's state title in the 3200 meters. (That's the two-mile, for those of us like me, who can't remember). We're so excited for her. She's worked very hard. We're so proud of her, win or lose, but I'm sure she's just ecstatic to have won. Way to go Kaylee!! 

(After you follow the link you have to scroll down to Session 3, #3 Girls 3200 Meter Run 4A to see her name and time in print, but there it is!)

Thursday, May 8, 2008


Lynne says in her comments that I haven't been writing enough. Lynne is a dear, dear friend, who is also sometimes mother-like to me. She knows I need both a friend and a mother. Sometimes she is one and sometimes the other. She knows just what to be in the right moment. After my Mom died, there were several people who volunteered to sort of "be there" for me when I felt I needed my Mom. Most were women in my ward at church, or friends of my Mom. All meant well, and I love seeing them, but none are continually in my life enough to be that person for me. Very likely, there is no replacement for one's Mom. But I have cherished friends who are there for me. Lynne is one. My mother-in-law is wonderful. I have two great friends in my neighborhood: Lauren and Janet. And, of course, my sister, Jenny (Too bad, we live far away from each other). One thing about all these women: they all serve those around them in remarkable ways.

My own mother hated Mother's Day. She said it was a day that reminded her of all her inadequacies. She had few. My mother-in-law claims my Mom was a saint. She probably was. But my mother-in-law fails to see her own wonderfulness. I watch her serve her family, her neighbors, friends, and strangers. The same is true of my sister Jenny and my friends Lynne, Amy, Janet, and Lauren. They are all kind, and generous, and true (which according to Winston Churchill is all you need). I learn a lot from each of them, just as I learned a lot from my own mother. So Happy Mother's Day. All I ask is that you follow the link below and read this poem which I love, love, love. I can't copy it here because I don't have permission. But go read it and think about it and have a Happy Mother's Day.

The poem is by Julia Kasdorf and is called "What I Learned from My Mother."

And now Lynne can be happy that I at least wrote something. :)